"Snail Mail" Is Just That, But At Least Baby Has Her Blankie
A version of this originally ran in The Virginian-Pilot on July 14, 2013.
Excellent work, USPS.
It took only about four months for you to transport a small package - containing a baby gift - from Virginia Beach, Va., to Greensboro, N.C.
The intended recipient was 3 months old when it was mailed and nearly 7 months old when it reached her. In retrospect, I should have put on my hiking boots and walked the present to her.
Inside that package was a soft, colorful baby blanket. It was mailed from my local post office on March 25 and arrived at its destination on July 11.
It was returned to me once, after eight weeks, for no reason.
Ever optimistic, I foolishly re-mailed the package and it took an additional nine weeks for delivery.
Yes, the postage was correct. So was the address. The workers in my local branch tried tirelessly to help me, yet no one seems to know where the package went while it was AWOL.
Fortunately, I splurged on Priority Mail or otherwise that drifting gift might not have made it to its destination until the recipient was in college. Come to think of it, the blanket would be cute in a dorm room - something to consider next time you're choosing a baby present that will be shipped by mail.
I suppose I should be grateful the package arrived in the same century.
In June, ABC News reported that a yellowed World War II love letter, mailed in 1944, had finally been delivered in New York City. It was 69 years late. Both the sender and his sweetheart were dead, but the person living at the MacDougal Street address managed to track down their son, Scott Matthews, who's now 67.
Luckily, that wayward letter hadn't contained a marriage proposal, or he might not exist.
Matthews, apparently given to understatement, told ABC, "You wonder what happened to it and what did the Postal Service do with it."
Yes, you do.
Stories like Matthews' make headlines. But how often do letters and packages - like mine - go mysteriously missing for months instead of decades?
I asked USPS that on Friday afternoon but didn't get a definitive answer.
Perhaps they'll mail it to me.
I take no pleasure in piling on the beleaguered U.S. Postal Service. In the past, I've defended this quasi-governmental agency, which is required to be self-supporting yet is hamstrung by crippling regulations.
In April, the postmaster general told Congress that the USPS loses $25 million a day.
Not to mention baby gifts and love letters.
My story had a happy ending.
The blanket arrived while the child was small enough to fit on it.
But here's a confession: A month or so after I mailed the package, I started to wonder whether my nephew and his sweet wife were the kind of people who didn't acknowledge gifts or whether they simply hated the one I had sent. New parents are busy and exhausted, of course, but with the advent of the Internet and social media, saying "Hey, we got it" has never been easier.
At the same time, they were no doubt beginning to think I was the sort of shallow person who says she's sending a gift, but never does.
I suppose there's a lesson here for anyone waiting impatiently for a gift, a thank-you note or a birthday card: Relax. Don't go postal. When you're dealing with the mail, these things can take time. Lots of it.