Buckle up, folks. Before I hit “send” on this piece I’m going to say something nice about Hillary Clinton.

Really. Wait for it. 

That’s how bad Kamala Harris is as a presidential candidate..

This female running for president, so full of JOY, so BRAT, so GIRL BOSS, has been hiding from the press for more than a month.  

And suddenly - through her mouthpieces - Kamala Harris is making weird, squishy demands about the upcoming debate with Donald Trump. For instance, she wants sit for 90 minutes, not stand. And she wants to bring notes with her.

What a lightweight.

Oh, and Harris finally agreed to a television interview, but once again it came with girly demands: First, she refused to do the interview live. The session that airs tonight on CNN will be pre-recorded, presumably so that the Democrat-friendly anchor and the Harris team can edit out any excessive cackling, nonsensical replies or outright gaffes.

It gets worse: Harris refused to go alone. The insecure veep insisted on having her emotional support teammate at her side, A man, of course. This little lady can’t go mano y mano with Dana Bash. 

I’m not the first to say it, but this is weak sauce, lady.  The only thing you’ll get from Bash is a juicy tongue bath.

You want to lead the Free World, you want to go toe to toe with Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping, but you giggle your way through requests for softball interviews, slip policies to the press through your aides like a coward so you won’t have to explain your daily flip flops and now you’re so frightened of one of the most outwardly partisan talking heads on cable news that you have to bring along your sidekick?

You realize you’re embarrassing women, don’t you? 

Those of us who have slogged along on our own in a man’s world (and that’s exactly what journalism was in the 1970s), not sleeping with bosses to get ahead or running at the first signs of adversity as you did in 2020, or leaning on men to get us through tense moments at work, look at you and shake our heads.

You’re no girl boss. That’s for sure.

OK, here it comes: As unlikable as she was, brimming over with the opposite of joy, at least Hillary Clinton was able to speak without teleprompters, did numerous interviews - by herself, like a big girl - and she managed to remain standing throughout her debates with Trump.

(Although there was that matter of Donna Brazile giving her the questions in advance, so that helped.)

Let’s face it, Kamala Harris is a political mirage. She’s whatever the Democrats need her to be: A back-stabbing vice president ready to jump in when the old guy is pushed off a cliff, a moderate Republican when polls show that her far-left policies are historically unpopular, a tough former prosecutor when crime stats are trotted out and not-the-border-czar when the subject of illegal immigration is raised. 

Harris’ snappy one-liners and snippy “I’m speakings” only work when she has a script.

Sooner or later during this abbreviated campaign Word Salad Annie will surface and neither friendly moderators nor Tonto Walz will be able to save her.