Pit Bull Petition Is Too Late. I Already Quit.

Google yourself. At least once a month.

That’s what the experts tell us. 

“Whether it's a potential employer, current employer, budding romantic partner, long-time significant other, or someone else in your life, there's a good chance they have or will run a Google search for your name,” tech expert Kim Komando wrote in USA Today. “Do you know everything that they'll find?

“The answer could make a difference between a job and the unemployment line, or a happily ever after and nights alone. That's why you need to run your own search first.”

Well, I did Google myself yesterday. Mostly to see if this website would be the No. 1 link.

And it was. 

Success!

I was surprised, however, to find that a change.org  petition to get me fired from my columnist gig at The Virginian-Pilot was right there in the number four spot. And it had nearly 5,000 signatures. Some of them recent.

Apparently, these pit bull lovers are unaware that I took a buy-out from the newspaper paper in December.

Hey, haters, it’s too late to fire me! I already quit.

The petition was launched in June of last year. Right after I wrote about a 90-year-old Virginia Beach woman who was disemboweled by a pit bull that her daughter had adopted from a local rescue outfit.

I took a bold stand against old ladies being savaged to death by pit bulls. And I used the latest pit bull fatality to call again for a ban on the breed, something that sends pit bull owners into orbit.

If you check the petition - shoot, go ahead and sign it, who cares - you’ll see what passes for intelligent argument among pit bull lovers.

For example, one commenter declared that “Kenney is a POS.” Geez. Get my name right if you're trying to get me sacked.

Another insisted that pit bulls are not a “viscous” breed. Um, spelling counts. Even on petitions.

Many didn't seem to know the difference between a columnist and a reporter.  

“I support the firing of this reporter for using her personal views in this article,” one sniffed.

Luckily, there will be no petition to fire the author of this well-written piece defending Denver’s pit bull ban and urging Castle Rock, CO to keep theirs. 

It was an unsigned editorial in Monday’s Denver Post, meaning it reflects the opinion of the publisher and the entire editorial board of that newspaper.

Seems Castle Rock’s town council - which enacted a pit bull ban 25 years ago - is going wobbly under pressure from pit bull fanatics who insist that when pit bulls maul it’s the fault of the breeder, the owner or the victim. 

Never the dog.

“The problem with pit bulls — the generic term that most often refers to the three dog breeds of American pit bull terrier, American Staffordshire terrier or Staffordshire bull terrier — is that when they are aggressive and do attack, the strength of the dog’s bite and its propensity to continue to attack after the fight has begun result in more traumatic outcomes, particularly for children,” argued The Denver Post editors. 

Exactly. Children, the elderly and small dogs are the most common victims of pit bulls. (Although in December a 22-year-old Virginia woman was torn apart by her own dogs in a particularly grisly death.)

Pit bulls may not bite more often than other breeds, but they’re responsible for most of the deaths and near-fatal maulings in this country.

That’s a fact.

And all the petitions in the world aimed at shutting up those who tell the truth won’t change that.