Those Sloppy Bidens. Always Misplacing Things.

I have to ask: Is there a sloppier family in all of America than the Bidens? They misplace everything.

First we have the degenerate son Hunter dropping off his laptop - loaded with felonious emails, insinuations about “the big guy” and repulsive photos - at a computer repair shop and apparently forgetting it was there.

Then there was the incident when Hunter’s  lover/former sister-in-law Hallie Biden tossed his .38 caliber handgun into a supermarket garbage can. He told her to get it back, but someone had already taken it. They finally found it.

President Biden’s daughter, Ashley, must have inherited the same slovenly gene. In 2015 she left a handwritten diary under a mattress in a Florida house.  In that candid journal, she reportedly confessed that her father used to shower with her and that it was “probably not appropriate.”

Probably?

Now we learn that Joe Biden himself has been cropdusting Delaware and Washington with classified material.

Part of a small stash of secret documents was found in early  November in Biden’s closet at the Penn Biden Center in Washington. That center opened in 2018, but Biden left the office of the veep a year earlier.  No one knows where those classified documents were for that missing year.

Perhaps, they too were under a mattress. Or in the safe-keeping of an Arkansas exotic dancer.

It gets worse.

Just yesterday we learned that more classified documents have been found. This time in the garage at one of Biden’s Delaware homes.

Not to worry, Biden said, those papers that should have been in the National Archives, were perfectly safe. Right next to the left front tire of his Corvette, which he really cares about and keeps in a LOCKED garage.

And everyone knows garage doors are Kryptonite to foreign spies.

Joe Biden says the classified documents were in a safe place because they were kept next to his corvette in his garage. Holy shit: pic.twitter.com/XykBjJXsMd

— Clay Travis (@ClayTravis) January 12, 2023

This latest episode makes me long for the days when Saturday Night Live was still funny. There would be cast members dressed as Biden family members fanning out to look for more top secret government documents: in the glovebox of the ‘Vette, the outdoor shower at the beach house, in Dr. Jill’s underwear drawer.

If the Bidens were smart - and none of them seem to be - they’d announce that the family had hired Marie Kondo, the queen of tidying up, to get the family organized.

Ms. Kondo is a genius. She’d find places for the Bidens to stash their guns, laptops, diaries and even their purloined paperwork.

You can be sure that none of those items would wind up in a cardboard box, next to the Corvette.